Sorry

Go ahead and call me a coward and say I'm not strong Because I'm not like you Go ahead and call me crazy cause I live in a maze Tell me how about you? I think I live in my head, sometimes I think that I'm dead I hide behind my youth No, I been losing my mind and I'm a little behind Step inside my shoes Cause I've never been happy with myself And I don't need no one feeling bad for me Trying to offer me pity and throw jabs at me Wanna give me advice and then laugh at me Behind closed doors Just close the door, let me be by myself Just me and myself I'm tired of living, I cry, I hear it's easy to die I wanna see for myself And I know that sounds crazy to everyone else But I'm depressed as fuck Stressed as fuck Ain't no medicine that could cure what's the test as drugs I mean, I need extra love And that ain't even enough 'Said that ain't even enough And where the fuck is God? (God, god) Damn, maybe I ain't believing enough And today we gonna see if he's real And if he is, I guess I'm probably going to hell Look, I ain't wanna die like this I ain't picture my life like this They don't know what it's like like this Pretending I'm happy so I can smile like this And laugh like you Sometimes I wonder if I ever act like you Could I finally fit in and maybe relax like woo Or would you feel lost without me? Cause honestly, I think the world is better off without me And my mind's spinning, this is the line finish Truth is, I don't care how they feel about my feelings I made up my mind, I'm going out like Robin Williams I guess I'm not the Ordinary People of John Legend And I've been suicidal since the day I was nine, shit Okay, the day I was nine I've been tired of being bullied, cuz, stay out the fire Grandma told me I should take it one day at a time And damn it, look at me now, fuck Fuck, pens runnin' out Shit, fu- *sigh* *scrapping paper* Look, just know it's a new day But if you reading this Then it's probably too late! *gunshot* Just make sure you tell my family It's okay, I'm sorry But it's too late, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I don't wanna live to see another day, I'm sorry But I can't stay, I'm sorry So much weighing on me Just make sure you tell my family It's okay, I'm sorry But it's too late, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I don't wanna live to see another day, I'm sorry But I can't stay, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I hope you got what you wanted I hope you finally happy It's too late for you Been going out of my mind You don't know how many times that I done prayed for you I hope you hear me, goddamn it Cause I got so much shit that I wanna say to you I used to shine, now I'm all in the dark I remember I used to tell you to follow your heart But goddamn it, look at you now, it's all of your fault How could you? Maybe it's my fault I shoulda paid more attention to what you been doing Maybe I should have been more of an influence I can't believe that you're dead, I fu- I read your letter and all I could do is have mixed feelings about it But I'll forever be attached to you, damn Part of me feels bad for you A part of me feels like you weak and I'm mad at you And I don't mean to be insensitive But I don't understand how we couldn't prevent this shit You took the easy way out Goddamn it, you dead I mean, look what you did I'm so fucking upset, how could you be so selfish? Nigga, how could you be so selfish? Now you're gone, you done left me so helpless I wonder what God thinks I hope you in God's place behaving yourself Yo, what the fuck you gotta say for yourself? (say for yourself) Look, I really feel lost without you I hate the fact you think the world is better off without you And my mind's spinning, this is the line finish Truth is, I don't care how you feel about my feelings And I'd be lying to you if I told you I'm fine, listen I know that you can hear me, all I need is like five minutes I just wanna reach inside the casket and pull you out I'm sorry this isn't something that we both could figure out I wish I could hear you now Is your soul missing? I wonder if you could do it again, would you do it different? Tell me what death is like Was it meant for you, brodie? Did the heaven support it? Are you fucking happy now? Did you get what you wanted? Isn't this what you wanted? I feel the temperature falling And you've been suicidal back day you were nine? Yeah, even back then, you was nine We was living on the edge, couldn't stay out the fire Grandma told us we should take it one day at a time And damn it, look at you now Shit, but it's a new day And if you can't hear me, it's probably too late FUCK Just make sure you tell my family It's okay, I'm sorry But it's too late, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I don't wanna live to see another day, I'm sorry But I can't stay, I'm sorry So much weighing on me Just make sure you tell my family It's okay, I'm sorry But it's too late, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I don't wanna live to see another day, I'm sorry But I can't stay, I'm sorry So much weighing on me Just make sure you tell my family It's okay, I'm sorry But it's too late, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I don't wanna live to see another day, I'm sorry But I can't stay, I'm sorry So much weighing on me Just make sure you tell my family It's okay, I'm sorry But it's too late, I'm sorry So much weighing on me I don't wanna live to see another day, I'm sorry But I can't stay, I'm sorry So much weighing on me