Intrusive Thoughts

I'm historically heartbroken Drownin' in my own emotions One minute away from breakin' down, down, down I'm always leavin' empty-handed No one wants a heart that's damaged Only know a love that lets me down, down, down Oh, starin' contest with the walls I'm givin' in to my intrusive thoughts What if I never find anybody to love Or I finally get the chance and I fuck it all up? 'cause I can't get hurt if I'm the first one to leave Woah, what if I get to heaven and it's not even real And I die before tellin' you how I really feel? 'Cause it feels like hell and I just can't help but think That maybe love's not for me If you don't look too closely You can't even tell I'm lonely Even though it keeps me up at night, night, night I try to keep myself distracted But I got all these awful habits Of listenin' to voices in my mind, mind, mind Oh, starin' contest with the walls I'm givin' in to my intrusive thoughts What if I never find anybody to love Or I finally get the chance and I fuck it all up? 'Cause I can't get hurt if I'm the first one to leave Woah, what if I get to heaven and it's not even real And I die before tellin' you how I really feel? 'Cause it feels like hell and I just can't help but think That maybe love's not for me Maybe love's not for me, oh-oh-oh Maybe love's not for me Maybe love's not for me For me, for me, for me Maybe love's not for me