Gaston (From "Beauty and the Beast"/Soundtrack Version)

Gosh, it disturbs me to see you Gaston Looking so down in the dumps Every guy here'd love to be you, Gaston Even when taking your lumps There's no man in town as admired as you You're everyone's favorite guy Everyone's awed and inspired by you And it's not very hard to see why No one's slick as Gaston No one's quick as Gaston No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston For there's no man in town half as manly BIMBETTES Perfect, a pure paragon LEFOU/MEN You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be on Who plays darts like Gaston Who breaks hearts like Gaston Who��s much more than the sum of his parts like Gaston GASTON As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating ALL My, what a guy, that Gaston GASTON I needed encouragement Thank you, LeFou LEFOU Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as you Too much GASTON ...Yep ALL No one fights like Gaston Douses lights like Gaston LEFOU In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Gaston GASTON When I hunt, I sneak up with my quiver And beasts of the field say a prayer First, I carefully aim for the liver Then I shoot from behind LEFOU Is that fair GASTON I don't care ALL No one hits like Gaston Matches wits like Gaston LEFOU In a spitting match, nobody spits like Gaston GASTON I'm especially good at expectorating *Spits* ALL Ten points for Gaston GASTON When I was a lad, I ate four dozen eggs Every morning to help me get large And now that I'm grown, I eat five dozen eggs So I'm roughly the size of a barge LEFOU/MEN Who has brains like Gaston Entertains like Gaston GASTON Who can make up these endless refrains like Gaston I use antlers in all of my decorating ALL Say it again Who's a man among men Who's the super success Don't you know Can't you guess Ask his fans and his five hangers-on There's just one guy in town Who's got all of it down... LEFOU And his name's G-A-S...T... I believe there's another T... It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate And I've never actually had to spell it out loud before... ALL Gaston