Ode De Toilet (The Toilet Song)

She says not to buy her flowers Or big expensive gifts She says she don't want jewelry And she doesn't need another dress If I want to show her how much I adore her The best way that I've found Is to make sure when I'm finished I put that toilet seat down We've been to counciling To try and see the ways we could improve This thing between us And different ways to show each other "I love you" Forget about those getaway vacations To romantic coastal towns If you want to say "I love you" Then put that toilet seat down 'Cause in the middle of the night It's cold and it's dark And when I hear my name in vain I know I haven't done my part She just wants me to support her And the best way that I've found So with a gentle hand and a loving touch I put that toilet seat down I know it's kind of funny You can teach a little puppy But it's very hard to train a grown man When I'm all about my business And the path of least resistance She's the one that suffers in the end In the middle of the night It's cold and it's dark And when I hear my name in vain I know I haven't done my part She just wants me to support her And the best way that I've found So with a gentle hand and a loving touch I put that toilet seat down Down, down