Dear Ben

I've watched you grow, from first kick, to first kiss Shoulder rides to sleepless nights Felt tip crows to scoring goals, and bedtime Katamino Watched you hold your own from boy to man As you stand firm, bare and bold, not afraid to walk alone Reveal your pain. Unique. Defiant. Uncompromising And with our compass lost, we talked long into the darkest hours Until we saw the burnished sky, and our eyes stung as our words blurred and became thoughts As we were silenced by the dawn We clung to each other like sailors in a storm as our world pitched and bucked, our breath stolen by grief But you stood strong, filled such big boots Gripped to the helm and steered us on into the calm Abandoned your lifetime ambition, to hold us down Took on a different mission, while we were turned inside out, raw and gaping But you wrapped us up in your dream, realised your vision and fed us with your words of power Like buccaneers, we sailed the seven seas and drank in the wonders of your world, and returned giddy with the heady smell of your success And when that time came, oh did we weep, but the tears that streaked our cheeks were stained with glee because we knew that this was not goodbye, that you'd be back, that you'd never really left Because love does not lessen by miles it's not locked out by doors or walls, but reinforced in thought and heart It cannot be lost like a key or a sock, or left behind in a box, it is present in each and every breath and flows deep with every beat and deed It may not be your presence but it's your essence that remains. Forever dancing like glitter in our air And now it's as clear to me my beautiful boy, as naked as the joy that caresses the creases of your eye, that you've finally found your one, your golden snitch, and my task is done For I've gained a daughter I've not lost a son [Spoken: Loyle Carner & his mum] [Loyle] Ma, [sigh] you wait till Emily hears that, you wait till the world hears that, Fuuuuuu [Jean] Do you like it? [Loyle] It's even better than the first one [Jean] Oh my days