Not So Great Britain

Take one policeman whose job is tough Investigating a coverup Looks to his colleagues for support Gets accused of nothing has to leave the force Not so Great Britain Not So Great Britain Not So Great And who knows why We pride ourselves on our sporting name Soccer after all is our national game And in Europe our teams are banned It's not the players they don't like It's the fans Not so Great Britain Not So Great Britain Not So Great And who knows why It's the land of hope and glory Where every school is preparatory early No wonder on election night Tories always win outright I was taught at school it's wrong to tell lies That golden rule it seems no longer applies Next time your teacher says you lied here's proof Just say you're being economical with the truth Not so Great Britain Not So Great Britain Not So Great And who knows why In the kingdom of Jackanory Where every picture it sells a story Woe is me what have we done Goodbye Hong Kong it's been fun I know how I feel when a child is sick You want to treat it and treat it quick But what's going to happen when the doctor Says We'd love to treat you but we have no beds Not so Great Britain Not So Great Britain Not So Great And who knows why So great in so many ways But not in others So cool nobody's fool Like any other