Love For Sale

Well I wake up this morning I rolled out of bed I felt like a dog who's been kicked in the head Checked out my mail there was letter that read Love for sale, love for sale I picked up the phone I called everyone I could I let my fingers do the walking through the telephone book You can't catch a fish if you ain't got the hook Love for sale, love for sale Send up a signal throw me a line Somebody explain this funny Valentine It might not be legal but it sure ain't a crime I'm one step from crazy and two steps behind I called Lt Columbo from my TV set I've tried the Dating Game I haven't found her yet I'm hoping that she's looking like a Penthouse Pet Love for sale, love for sale We've been living together 3 years 2 hours, 20 minutes maybe four houndred beers You can't shop for love when you're shopping at, Sears Love for sale, love for sale I guess I've learnt my lesson it was easy to see My old lady she played this joke on me I never looked where I forgot it would be Love for sale, love for sale