The Smell of Rebellion

This school of late has started reeking - Quiet, maggots, when I'm speaking - Reeking with a most disturbing scent Only the finest nostrils smell it But I know it oh-too-well It is the odour of rebellion It's the bouquet of dissent And you may bet your britches This headmistress Finds this foul odiferousness Wholly olfactorily insulting And so to stop the stench's spread I find a session of phys ed Sorts the merely rank from the revolting The smell of rebellion comes out in the sweat And phys ed will get you sweating And it won't be long before I smell the pong Of aiding and abetting A bit of phys ed will tell us who Has a head full of rebellious thoughts Hold Hold Just like a rotten egg floats To the top of a bucket of water Chorus 1: One, two, three, four The smell of rebellion The stench of revolt The reek of insubordination I can't take it anymore One, two, three, four The whiff of resistance The pong of dissent The funk of mutiny in action That's not right Before a weed becomes too big and greedy You really need to nip it in the bud POSITION TWO Before the worm starts to turn You must scrape off the dirt And rip it from the mud Chorus 2: One, two, three, four x2 The whiff of insurgence The stench of intent The reek of pre-pubescent protest But that's not right One, two, three, four x2 The funk of defiance The odour of coup The waft of anarchy in progress I can't take it anymore Once we've exercised these demons They shall be too pooped for dreaming Some double-time discipline Should stop the rot from setting in All right - let's step it up Double-time One, two, three, four Discipline Discipline For children who aren't listening For midgets who are fidgeting And whispering in history Their chattering and chittering Their nattering and twittering Is tempered with a smattering of Discipline We must begin insisting On rigidity and discipline Persistently resisting This anarchistic mischieving These minutes you are frittering On pandering and pitying While little ones like this They just want discipline The simpering and whimpering The dribbling and the spittling The 'Miss, I need a tissue' Is an issue we can fix There is no mystery to mastering The art of classroom mistressing It's discipline, discipline, discipline Chorus 3: The smell of rebellion The stench of revolt The reek of pre-pubescent plotting The whiff of resistance The pong of dissent The funk of moral fibre rotting Imagine a world with no children Close your eyes and just dream Imagine Come on - try it The peace and the quiet A babbling stream Now imagine a woods with a cottage And inside that cottage we find A dwarf called Zeke, a carnival freak Who can fold paper hats with his mind And he says, Don't let them steal your horses No Don't let them throw them away No If you find your way through, They'll be waiting for you, Singing 'neigh neigh' CHILD, spoken She's mad MISS TRUNCHBULL Aha And there, just like I said The stinking maggot rears his head Even the squittiest, pittiest mess Can harbour seeds of stinkiness Have you ever seen anything more repellent Have you ever smelled anything worse Than that smell of rebellion MISS TRUNCHBULL, overlapping, foreground The stench of revolt The reek of insubordination The whiff of resistance The pong of dissent CHILDREN, overlapping, background x2 Discipline, discipline No more whispering Children need discipline Cut out their whimpering If you're mischeiving She'll sniff you out Without a doubt She's a snout in a million And I will not stop 'til you are squashed 'Til this rebellion is quashed 'Til glorious, sweaty discipline has washed This sickening scent Away